Today marks exactly two weeks since this happened.
We all experience break ups. I’ve survived a handful of them. Unfortunately, that fact doesn’t make this one any easier.
I know what I’m in for. I know that it will be a while before I feel 100% again. I also know that things get a little bit better every day.
I have ups and downs. Up until three days ago, I had been crying at least once a day. I actually find it a bit comical that at any given moment, I’ll break into tears for five minutes, and then go back to what I was doing. I’m happy to say that I haven’t cried since Thursday.
I am trying to embrace each emotion I come across. I don’t try to prevent myself from crying. However, I have been wearing mascara when I go out to try to keep from crying in public. It hasn’t really worked. My mascara is waterproof anyway.
More often than not, my down moments come at times when I have someone who cares about me around. My mother’s shirt sleeves have more tear stains on them than I can count. My friends have been there for me through it all.
Dara, who I’ve known since preschool, seems to know exactly what to do and how to turn my mood around. When I broke down one night while making dinner, she insisted we throw every single reminder into a box. It was a genius idea.
My friends and family have helped me become excited and hopeful for this new chapter of my life. Dara, especially, has inspired and encouraged me to make changes I probably wouldn’t have been ready to make so soon on my own.
One change that could not have been made possible without her was the recent transformation of my bedroom walls from red to purple.
When I moved into my apartment in my parents’ house, the bedroom walls were dark red. My brother, David, and his wife, Angela, lived in the apartment before they bought their house, and let’s just say we have different taste in paint colors. When I moved in in March, I assumed I’d be moving out not long after, however, and decided to leave the walls the way they were.
Flash forward six months, and it looks like I’ll be living here a bit longer. When I mentioned the idea of painting to Dara, she not only encouraged me to go for it, she also locked me into a date. Her text message read, “I can do September 10th.”
And that was it. September 10th was painting day.
It only took me five hours to pick a color.
I finally decided on Behr Pixie Violet. It seemed girly and perfect to me.
Everyone (everyone = my brothers) told me that I’d probably need three or four coats to cover the red. It only took two.
I bought the kind of paint with the primer mixed in, so that definitely helped.
I like this color much better than the red.
Much, much better.
I even bought a new comforter to match:
I plan to get some art work in there. Probably some black and whites for dramatic effect.
I’m really happy with the result. Dara and I were so excited about the color that we kept yelling “PURPLE” to each other all day.
Continuing with the theme of change, I also asked Dara to dye my hair on Friday night. It went from this:
Today I am meeting up with Cynthia for a lunch and shopping adventure! She happens to be in Rockland for work, and I’m VERY excited to see her. I miss all of my CDNY blends (blog friends). And with that, I’m off!
Have a great Monday! <3