Change is Good

Today marks exactly two weeks since this happened.

In the two plus years I’ve been writing this blog, I’ve always been very open about my life and feelings. I don’t plan to treat this experience any differently.

We all experience break ups. I’ve survived a handful of them. Unfortunately, that fact doesn’t make this one any easier. 

I know what I’m in for. I know that it will be a while before I feel 100% again. I also know that things get a little bit better every day.

I have ups and downs. Up until three days ago, I had been crying at least once a day. I actually find it a bit comical that at any given moment, I’ll break into tears for five minutes, and then go back to what I was doing. I’m happy to say that I haven’t cried since Thursday.

I am trying to embrace each emotion I come across. I don’t try to prevent myself from crying. However, I have been wearing mascara when I go out to try to keep from crying in public. It hasn’t really worked. My mascara is waterproof anyway.

More often than not, my down moments come at times when I have someone who cares about me around. My mother’s shirt sleeves have more tear stains on them than I can count. My friends have been there for me through it all.

Dara, who I’ve known since preschool, seems to know exactly what to do and how to turn my mood around. When I broke down one night while making dinner, she insisted we throw every single reminder into a box. It was a genius idea.

My friends and family have helped me become excited and hopeful for this new chapter of my life. Dara, especially, has inspired and encouraged me to make changes I probably wouldn’t have been ready to make so soon on my own.

One change that could not have been made possible without her was the recent transformation of my bedroom walls from red to purple.

Dara Painting

When I moved into my apartment in my parents’ house, the bedroom walls were dark red. My brother, David, and his wife, Angela, lived in the apartment before they bought their house, and let’s just say we have different taste in paint colors. When I moved in in March, I assumed I’d be moving out not long after, however, and decided to leave the walls the way they were.

Flash forward six months, and it looks like I’ll be living here a bit longer. When I mentioned the idea of painting to Dara, she not only encouraged me to go for it, she also locked me into a date. Her text message read, “I can do September 10th.”

And that was it. September 10th was painting day. 

Me Painting

It only took me five hours to pick a color.

Behr Pixie Violet

I finally decided on Behr Pixie Violet. It seemed girly and perfect to me.

Everyone (everyone = my brothers) told me that I’d probably need three or four coats to cover the red. It only took two.

Dara Painting

I bought the kind of paint with the primer mixed in, so that definitely helped.

I like this color much better than the red.

Behr Pixie Violet

Much, much better.

I even bought a new comforter to match:

Comforter Comforter

I plan to get some art work in there. Probably some black and whites for dramatic effect. 

Dresser

I’m really happy with the result. Dara and I were so excited about the color that we kept yelling “PURPLE” to each other all day. 

Continuing with the theme of change, I also asked Dara to dye my hair on Friday night. It went from this:

Dara and Me

To this:

Different Hair Color I like it. What do you think?

Today I am meeting up with Cynthia for a lunch and shopping adventure! She happens to be in Rockland for work, and I’m VERY excited to see her. I miss all of my CDNY blends (blog friends). And with that, I’m off!

Have a great Monday! <3

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10 comments

  1. the room looks great! my room was that color for a long time, it definitely has a soft place in my heart :) and your hair looks awesome! I love the length and color. Excited to see you on friday <3

  2. The paint job and dye job both look much better! I love both.

    Re: your tweet re: Boston … don’t make any rash life changes without a plan in place, and without knowing that your plan is the right plan for you. I know. I’ve done it. I’ve taken jobs without really thinking, moved places without really thinking. Sometimes these things work out and are good, and sometimes they don’t. But even when they work out, you’re still left confused about what your next steps are because you never had a plan in the first place.

    So take the time to come up with something, anything, as long as you’re positive that it’s what you want. It may hit you in the shower later today, or it may take a while. Even if you feel stagnant, as long as you’re contemplating your life and where you want to go, you’re still accomplishing something. It’s taken me three years to get to the point where I’m at today, to really know what I feel my purpose in life is and where I want to go from here. Take the time to be sad and grieve, but don’t make a huge change just because you feel you need it. Make a huge change when you know it’s what’s right.

    Hopefully that didn’t get too deep on you, and I hope it helps, even a little bit. :-)

    1. Thanks for your comment, Carly. I really appreciate your advice.I know how important it is to have a plan in place before changing anything major about my life.I’m definitely taking everything one day at a time.I’ll keep you updated on how things turn out! :-)

  3. PURPLE!!!!!!! I love the way your hair came out. :)
    You are very strong, and are doing so well with things. We hate change, and you have shown that it’s possible to do it!
    You should read Who Moved My Cheese? Its great btw… about times changing around you, and tips to deal. :)

    See you friday for more fun! I am glad i could be there to help. <3

    1. Dara,

      PURPLE!!! I will definitely check out Who Moved My Cheese. I have a whole list of books people have suggested I read during all this. Good thing my mom works at the library! I’m currently reading Eat, Pray, Love. Love it so far.

      See you FRIDAY!

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