BLAHG Post: I’m Overwhelmed

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Blahg Post: I'm

Hello. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately so this post is just going to be a big brain dump.

I’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately and it’s not that anything bad has happened in my life. In fact, I’ve experienced a ton of GOOD things recently! But the thing about me and my anxiety is that even good things can feel overwhelming.

I feel like my anxiety has been in overdrive since mid-September. First, there was the flea situation, then there was the lump situation (working on an update for that, by the way), not to mention getting ready for the Midterms (because Jeff is the Chair of our county’s Democratic Party) and taking the leap to teach an Instagram class this past weekend. I have been REALLY stressed.

I’m trying to focus on self-care and less critical self-talk.  A lot of times I tell myself I shouldn’t feel a certain way but the truth is you can’t control your thoughts and feelings, you can only control what you do with them. There are no shoulds or shouldn’ts.

I beat myself up all the time because my anxiety prevents from doing the simplest tasks. I stress out over things that I WANT to do. I want to blog. I want to teach people how to use Instagram. I want to meet a friend for coffee. I want to clean my house. I want to go to the gym. So why do I start to dread it all?

My mom is coming to visit on Monday and I’ve been looking forward to it for MONTHS. Jeff and I are hosting Thanksgiving at our house for the first time in our lives. My in-laws are coming, too.  I AM SO EXCITED. But I’m also overwhelmed by my to-do list.  I’m overwhelmed by how much there is to clean (and why can’t we ever keep our house clean?). I’m stressed that we don’t have enough art on the walls and that we haven’t hung the dining room curtains (even though we’ve lived in this house for almost two years). I’m stressed that our bathtub is leaking (and we haven’t had it fixed yet). I’m stressed that I have to grocery shopping (for recipes I’m excited to make). I’m stressing out about getting it all done and I’m beating myself up because I absolutely have time to do it all but my anxiety paralyzes me instead.

Yesterday, after talking to my friend Amanda about not feeling satisfied with any of my blog drafts, she said, “maybe you should write a blog post about feeling blah instead? And call it a blahg post.”

So, here it is, a “BLAHG” post and I’m writing it because I needed to get it all out. I’m writing it because I know I can’t be alone in these feelings. I’m writing it because I’m feeling blah and wanted to talk about it.

As always, thanks for reading.

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  1. Hang in there! I’m also working on less critical self-talk but I’m unfortunately really good at that (sigh). It definitely helps to just get it all out on paper (or in a post) sometimes though! Writing has been my “therapy” for the past 18 years (holy eff has it really been that long?!)!

  2. I remember those days when you kiddies were small and I was working full-time. I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with holidays, Thanksgiving included. Guess what? We all made it through. So, listen to Farrah and “hang in there”. I’m so excited to see you and Jeff on Monday that I’ve put my anxiety about the trip in the back seat and plan on having a grand old time! Love, Mom

  3. Here are 2 ideas I implemented this year, doing wonders for my overall ‘tude. Poindexter, my inner critic, lives to harass. After trying self-talks and other would-be solutions —that bombed— I finally stumbled onto paydirt.

    First, I keep a notebook in my back pocket. I start the day with a dated header, then dump every thought worthy of capture. ToDos are scattered among just-cuz notes. I review each evening, adding a yellow highlighter block before the ToDo entries. Result: it changes the psychology. I’m in control, because I decide which items get an asterisk, for tackling the next day. No set separate list, which I dub Poindexter’s Playground.

    Second part. In the same book, I set aside 8 pages for quotes. When Poindexter starts doing his thing, I do mine → I flip to the quotes; eat some mental Wheaties; and Poinny vamooses. Turns out, being ignored is his kryptonite!

    Bottom line: I finally figured out that if I can take the time to recharge my phone each day, I owe me at least that much. So hang in there. And do find little tricks to smooth the rough spots. Works! Honest for true
    Pam recently posted…QuickNote: 22 Qs: Connect with Your Mind, Spirit, + BodyMy Profile

    1. Thanks for your comment, Pam! Love your methods of self-care and coping with anxiety, especially the pages of quotes that you can turn to. It’s true that distracting from and ignoring the intrusive thoughts help a bunch!

  4. I hope that you’re able to enjoy your mom’s visit. I’ve been feeling a bit blah myself lately. Like you always tell me, there are good days and bad days, and everything we learned on the good days we can use on the bad days. Sending hugs <3

  5. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings. We all have our moments,days, and even weeks of being overwhelmed. These last few weeks sure have had me feeling that way. I guess with aging, I am learning to think to myself-it is what it is. I do my best and I know perfection is not what is going to happen. Often think of the Beatles song-Let It Be.
    Hang in there and enjoy your holiday visiting. Love and laughter is what it is really all about.

  6. Totally feel ya! That anxiety freeze is something I experience too. You’re doing a lot friend. I believe in you!! And I love the blahg idea. I journal about my anxieties and then I’m not so paralyzed by them. Thank you for sharing and being open, I miss you!!

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